Since few years ago,
many of you have heard me mentioning the microwaves, but how can be an electronic
device so protagonist? Why so many complains and disappointments? Well, the
image we have in our mind it is practical just to know what is it about. In this
case we are talking about a behaviour. It has been present in my last years and
I can say that it is the star of my jokes’ stuff, few people knew it out from
where I am coming from, but now more and more people understand this philosophy around the world, so I can say that I am a kind of prophet who is advertising to the
society about the risk of being microwaved.
It is said that the microwave person is the one who heats
you up but doesn't cook you, but is it bad? Is it good? It depends on what
are you looking for and how sensitive you are. Heating is something necessary
in the field of flirting, but it could be dangerous, overheating can cause
burns.
Let’s imagine a
situation, for example the most common place for microwaving: a club in a
Saturday night. We are surrounded by a lot of people who we probably would
like few, our mind has started getting affected because of the alcohol and we are just enjoying the party. Suddenly in the middle of the night we meet
someone who looks interested in us but we haven’t realised that she or he was
in the disco until you start speaking. As long as the conversation is going on,
our “why not” spirit is growing so
probably we have started thinking that we can change our plans for tonight.
Since we are not the man of steel and our balls or ovaries neither, we start
feeling the attraction so our reproductive parts of the body start getting
excited.
In a heated situation, we kiss, we touch and we are just thinking in the next step. In this moment we feel full of energy and with possibilities to do it, but although we try
so hard we don't manage it. We ask ourselves “WTF is wrong?”, we can feel
the desire on their eyes, in their kisses or even in their wet underwear, but finally you
go home with a considerable balls-pain. Why? Why?
After a deep
research in this field, we can consider many possible reasons:
1. Culture: In the area in which they are living is not well seeing to have sex so early,
they need more time to meet the person and they need to keep their desire in order
not to break the rules of their common process.
2. Insecurity: They are ready to have some kisses but they don’t feel secure enough to
deal with the next step, they need more confident in the relationship.
3. The aim to keep the boy: They don’t have sex soon because they think
there are some protocols so as they won’t be one night girls
4. The players: Some of them are kissing people just for feeling naughty and powerful,
they are especially insensitive and they can do it also to grow their self-confidence
seeing the desire of the others no matter their feelings.
It’s good to know
about reasons, the first 3 are understandable, but the last one could be so
cruel playing with others’ feelings. Everyone
could be a player, but the match takes a certain time, after that we are over
forcing, what’s more, the painful part of microwaving is for how long are
you practising it and the intensity of the action.
Now we know what they
are and why could the reasons be, so how
can we recognise them? Actually, it’s difficult, it’s not possible to
recognise them at first, we need to speak with them and figure out what kind
of interest they have. However, it’s possible to face them up, their weak point is the honesty and clarity.
Most cases occur
because of the lack of honesty and clarity, when the messages are sent or
misunderstood between lines. Therefore, we should try to develop a clear enough
and understandable conversation trying to show our aims and playing with the temperature of the process
using the words and movements as tools. In every flirting situation must appear
a heating (we are humans, not machines) and if we are too direct and cold, it
would be like extinguishing the flame of the relationship with liquid nitrogen, we
need to find the valance.
Last but not least, it
is very important to know who is playing
with who, so we should keep some power to be able to manage the situation.
We get this power not being so easy and forcing them to make an effort so as to
get what they want and appreciate it.
Anyway, if you hang out with the aim of just have fun and
meet new people without expectation, it is always positive. In addition,
just meet people and let the next step for other day in which the alcohol is
not doing a threesome with you will help a lot. Then we’ll be able to think and
act better and for sure it will be more difficult to cheat and play unfair.
Regarding to the gender of this topic, it is more
usual to find girls microwaving guys, but there are cases in which it happen
the opposite. It’s quite strange seeing a guy rejecting sex from a girl after
kissing each other, but it can happen. Nevertheless, it is more common to find
situations in which the guy shows interested in the girl but finally he is not
in that way, she doesn't even get a kiss, he is just a microwave.
To sum up, take into
account that just be kissing doesn't mean that we are being microwaved, it will depend on the intensity of the action. If you are playing the game of flirting you can be overheated and
that can be painful not only for your feelings but also for some parts of your
body, so if you want to be cooked just keep
calm and look for ovens ;)
